New Year's Resolutions 2012

Another year is lurking in the background, waiting to pounce upon us and devour our souls in the night. ...possibly. For this year, 2012, I have a lot of great resolutions for myself. You can consult the Five-Year Plan, for the things that'll certainly happen, but these are the Goals. The One-Year Goals, if you will. All the folk call them resolutions, though.

Let's review:
Old Year's Resolutions 2010
New Year's Resolutions 2011
Success Rate:
I've still got that girlfriend, so I'll be sure to keep her happy.
I still don't have a Kindle.
I did, indeed, write like the wind. A rather languid, breezy wind, but a wind nonetheless.
I'm in slightly better shape now, and I use the Internet slightly less.
Prognosis: Negative. (Which is, of course, good.)

Here, in no particular order, are the 2012 resolutions:

Drink Wine
Beer's too easy, esp. this low-alcohol but delicious Thai beer (cf. Singha). I figure if I celebrate every Saturday with a $20 bottle of red wine as opposed to a $20 box of twelve bottles of beer over the course of a week, I'll be in better shape, mentally and physically. Perhaps some mixture of those two items, using linear programming to determine optimal configuration. I don't know. I'm never drunk in Thailand, I just don't want to get gout. That'd be...embarrassing.

Never Volunteer For Anything Again
In case you hadn't figured it out by now, I've been in Thailand these last twenty-seven months as a Peace Corps Volunteer. That's the first and last I'll mention it on this blog, but I have to say (1) I recommend it and (2) I've done my time. Henceforth I am a Man of Business, and I think I can save the world a lot more effectively if I have a Lot of Money, rather than, say...not.

Dave Frost will be taking charge of any further political and economic discussions along those lines, so don't ask me. (He'll be writing an MBA blog, even.)

Eat Less, Better
It turns out I really, really like fish, to the exclusion of just about every other food, and my health has massively improved since I became a de facto pescatarian. I doubt I'll make it official, but I will avoid non-food obsessively, and eat for taste. Damn you, Michael Pollan, and your stupid consciousness-raising. Now I've turned into a 'picky eater'. If you're confused, just consult Food Rules.

Oh, and
Also Less Coffee
oog

Apatheism
Not going to make a big deal of this, but as of 2012, I'm going to act as if religion doesn't exist. For those of you who practice personal religion, that won't make a big difference. Those with a political religion will need to take note. Here's a handy guideline: If your proposition depends on religious belief, it is no longer admissible in my court of evidence for argument, and I will shut it down/delete/ignore it with all due haste.

This is purely for my Creative mental health...and also I'm bored with the discussion. I'm too lazy to be an Atheist. Just leave me alone. I've got so many other interests that I can afford to be rather dull on one topic.

I will continue to make my regular contributions to the ACLU so that everybody—at least in America—can argue out in the open, and if your religious-affiliated charity/NGO has stripped all mention of religion out of its primary charitable goal (I've worked with loads of NGOs, I can assess), I'll contribute to that too.

Don't Be Isolated
Living in the jungle for two years has given me an appreciable window on my mental health, and it turns out I like to have lots of people around to absorb my Creati-Babble. Facebook and blogs just doesn't cut it. I'm going to cut a swathe through whatever social scene I can find.

Play a "Sport"
I've been using Fitocracy (follow me!) for a while now, and it's been super-helpful. I hate the gym, so it would seem the best way for me to get in shape is to pick up a sport, and a pick-up sport at that. Maximum one piece of equipment, so basketball, soccer, 'ultimate frisbee', whathaveyou. More on that as it develops.

Play more Settlers of Catan
Pretty self-explanatory, really. I like human contact, and trading, and board games, all in convenient 30-minute increments. Let's make it happen, people.

Write Lots of Short Stories
In 2012, I'm going to compulsively write a lot of short stories and put them up everywhere. I've pretty much determined that I love writing short stories most of all, and it's an Exercise in Focus. They'll all be entered as part of the (H2NH Stories 2012) series, then split up into collections (with real cover art) by fives and fifteens (for eBooks) and thirties (for POD). Fun!

Fifty of these stories will be under the auspices of Write1Sub1 "Reloaded", but as you can see from my cover art template, I'm anticipating triple digits. You'll be able to follow the progress via the page I'll set up, accessible by clicking on the cover art template in the side-bar. That's the challenge, people.

-daB
feel free to comment

Christmas Eve 2011

Christmas Eve—otherwise known as The Only Holiday I Celebrate—is upon us, and I'm having a wonderful time! Let's report it the traditional way:

Christmas Past

Since I knocked my own Christmas Past out of the park with Christmas Eve 2010, I'll just provide you with my favorite part of the movie I'll be watching with my girlfriend tonight:
Man, those guys knew how to spread Christmas cheer.

Christmas Present

Did I mention my girlfriend? I think I might have. This is the Second Annual Christmas Party & Debauch, so I'm ready to settle in to some delicious fish, beer, and et cetera. What a time we'll have, writing dry spell notwithstanding, and then I'll be ready to embrace the new year 2012 (Thai year 2555) with open arms, heart and mind. I'm going back to America in a month or two, but I'll be back, for my pineapple girl.

She's the reason for the season.

What? You wanted a Christmas Girl? Do your own damn Google Image Search, you perverts.

Christmas Future

I've already made my five-year plan, and nothing can change it, so let's talk about the real Future. Specifically, why haven't I had the opportunity to go colonize wherever the hell this is yet?

source

It's "a habitable exoplanet in orbit around a red dwarf". Look at those lush continents! Man, we could be doing so many cool things on the land, and talking to the local whale population. Plus, everything will be all red and cool. That makes dramatic speeches more spooky:

Governor David Barron, exhorting the colonists.

Who's with me? I'll give Humanity until 2024, then I'm going by myself. Don't make me come back there.

Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

-daB
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Dry Spells And The Sorcerer

I have a terrible confession to make: I haven't finished anything in two months. I've written lots of words, but I haven't been enjoying the real, true reason that I write...that is to say: Having Written. "Behold," I like to say, "I wrote that." Nobody wants to know what you're writing. That's the most boring thing you could ever tell anybody. What they want to know is: "Is it done yet?!?" Well, it's not.

Dry Spells

Some finished works are more appreciated than others.

So, I think it's best to call this a "dry spell", because that sounds better than "drought". If the writer is a weather system, there's water out there, but it's just not filling up any particular buckets. Let's try to diagnose, shall we?

Writer's Block
Nope. Do you see all these books I have to write? And that's not even including the short stories that exist in potentia and first paragraphia. No, I currently have more ideas than I can shake a stick at, and they're piling up more and more as I get farther and farther behind. It's very annoying.

Distracted By The Sexy
While this is a fine theory, it seems rude to blame everything on my amazing perfect relationship which is better than yours in every way. Also, sexier. Stop being rude, guys. Even though:

The Sexy

Hmm...

Lack of Sleep
Oh, now I'm just showing off.

Lack of Concentration
There's been a lot of paperwork, uncertainty and background negotiations involved to make my Five Year Plan work, and I've found that it's hard to focus on an invented narrative when I'm trying to make an actual, real-life story come true. But that's not a good enough excuse. I've been busier than this, and still managed to write a whole pile of stories.

Maybe I'm just SCARED
Maybe YOU'RE just scared. Yeah. How's that feel?

Headache
Maybe it's because I have a massive headache on a daily basis for no physical reason. Yeah, that might be part of it. I should drink more coffee.

Writing Block
When I sit down to write at my computer, I don't. Or, that is, I don't get to the sit down to write part. I don't think there's a psychology here...I think I'm just unstable. It'll work out before the New Year.

Anyways, I haven't been inactive. I've got a lot of reading done, a lot of reading. That can't hurt. I feel I should read at least ten books for every one I write. It takes about the same amount of time. I've also been keeping up with the short story magazines, and I've got a whole bunch of logistics worked out.

The only solution is to Write More.

I'm going to do the Write1Sub1 weekly thing in 2012, that'll keep me focused. I'll also be writing at least five book projects in 2012, whether I want to or not. Oog.

The Sorcerer

What the hell? (link)

So, let's leave that aside. The solution is easy, it'll just appear one of these days, and there I'll be: back to my prodigious output. I've got a more interesting problem, which is MAGIC. As a writer, I'm a philosopher-magician, but I prefer the term sorcerer because it's more fun to intone, like so:

SORCERER!

It is a well-known fact amongst sorcerers that they need some influences, so I've decided to take my writing career to the next level by invoking the names of sorcerer-writers of the PAST AND PRESENT. Also, I added adjectives.

I invoke thee:

Stephen King
accessible, popular

Harlan Ellison

challenging, robust

Anne McCaffrey

great characters, settings

Henceforth consider me those three, combined, for the next generation. Thanks!
...now:
Excuse me while I disappear, in cloud of smoke and rustle of cape.
-daB
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