Anniversary!

Today's my one-year anniversary with my sexy secretary!

pictured?

(she's not actually my secretary, guys, but she is sexy and...)

The first movie we saw as a couple was Secretary, which may or may not be indicative of our relationship. I'm not telling. (Probably not.) (I kinda talk like James Spader though?) It's still a good romantic comedy, so you should go see it. After that we saw Music and Lyrics. Let's call some mixture of those two our official couple movie, OK? (They talked too fast in The Thin Man and His Girl Friday.)

Our Song is "Wonderful Tonight" (Eric Clapton) ... the good version. 

Our anniversary meal will be "Bla Lui Suan" (literal translation: Fish Invades a Garden), which is delicious fish covered in a spicy nut mixture and surrounded by vegetables. I'm always too hungry to take a picture of it when it's ordered, but it looks kinda like this:

Ours will be bigger (because we provide the fish), spicier, with more vegetables.

As an anniversary gift to me, I'm declaring myself "Offline-lite". This is also my gift to her, because I'm too focused and annoying without the Internet to distract me. I'm like a junkie, but with Flash. Also, where else am I going to get relationship advice from completely untrustworthy sources?

Thanks to all this stability, my health, my confidence, my writing (you know, that thing what this blog is about?), my finances...oh, c'mon! My entire life has improved for the better. Possibly there was some nagging involved, but that's OK.
  

I look forward to five or six more years of stable relationship bliss, at which point we will have a big fight about something or other and then get back together with a furious passion, our differences becoming our strengths and a best-selling novel of a writer's romance entitled "Make-Up". Followed by a romantic comedy on the big screen and successful television situation comedy. It will be more awesome than Mr. and Mrs. Smith and not a complete rip-off at all, nosir. (Add that to the Couple Movie mélange...)

Then happiness forever, et cetera, and the checks never stop coming in. What more stable a relationship could two ask?

I love you, lady.

feel free to comment

Controversy!

Say it the British way: conTrahversy!

"Drugs are Legal, People Ain't" is my first brush with controversy in my writing. Damn, that's a good thing. I was getting worried.

Here's the deal: a Writer should be controversial, but not because of who he is. That is to say, he should be controversial because of who his characters are. The writer is an entirely separate entity who undoubtedly has his own opinion, but (aside from the mere mundane politics of camera placement) is entirely uninvolved in the debate. That is to say, a Writer should write such that if he ever writes a satire it will be clearly labeled as such without his direct declaration.

In other words, write a story, give the viewpoint opposite yours the strongest argument and see if 'your side' can keep up. If they can't, why the heck are they your side again? Either take over or make your own side, with blackjack and hookers. Well, Fair Trade hookers.

#

I'm speaking as someone who has a very competent secretary.

I've always been attracted to competence, and there's a certain point at which extreme competence becomes extremely sexy. I'm saying that somebody who can manage the minutiae of a busy executive's life while he wallows in the clouds of Business must have some other skill besides filling out an A-line skirt in a most admirable manner.

She's amazing, and I'm not just writing this because she's looking over my shoulder while tapping her watch-hand for me to take her out on our date.

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250 words? Yes
Project "Untitled"
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Reading - "Aztec" (Gary Jennings)

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