Into The Green, Day Four

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I like abstract art, and I like representational art. But some art just falls in the middle of those two, and thus Sucks. This brings us tenuously around to the Uncanny Valley theory of robotics. I think robots should embrace their identity as robots and stop trying to dress up like their human masters. You've got a culture, robots, be all shiny and metal (or green and leafy or made of clockwork and steam) and be happy. 

This isn't a call to segregation, just a call to quit creeping us squishy humans out with your unnecessary pseudo-flesh. C'mon! 

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250 words? Yes

Project "Untitled"

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Reading - ?

*057

Into The Green, Day Three

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If I ever own my own house, it'll be constructed of the most advanced biotech available and be as amazingly Green as possible. The added bonus that my house will live forever and be able to produce offspring may go unremarked in the media.

Actually, I think this is a library, but that'll just be another grand feature of my house. That and the bar.

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250 words? Yes

Project "Untitled"

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Reading - ?

*056

Into The Green, Day Two

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I can't even tell which side the above image is attempting to mock. Parody is getting way too subtle and ironic for me to untangle, which is probably bad for any attempt at discourse. Hew to the Colbert Report level of parody, which is clearly labeled and has a convenient linguistic cue to tell when the parodist is "in-character" or not.

Point is, if your parody needs an accompanying explanation, the terrorists win. 

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250 words? Yes

Project "Untitled"

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Reading - ?

*055

Into The Green, Day One

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David Barron is hacking his way through a jungle both literal and metaphorical. The path is strewn by the corpses of those who've gone before him, but he will persevere. For on the other side is Tranquility and Dancing.

Question: Is that enough?
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250 words? Yes
Project "Untitled"
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Reading - ?

*054

SEX!

A post in which the exclamation point proves to be purely decorative.

"The Language of Ice Cubes" has had more 'on-screen' sex than other pieces I've written, for artistic reasons. How people have sex (broadly defined) says just as much about their relationship as whether they're having sex at all, and with more nuance. To bastardize Clausewitz: "Sex is Character Development by other means."

This is not to say that it's particularly raw, because describing the mechanics of sex with words is like describing the mechanics of a fight scene. It's counter-productive, rather dull, and isn't really necessary. The direct novelization of Ong-Bak would be really bad, is my point, because nobody wants to slog through more than a paragraph of "Then did Muay Thai Warrior raise his arm to deflect the assassin's kick and slam an elbow into the man's head, sending him flailing. Following up with a mighty kick, the warrior propelled the man off the top of the elephant temple, falling, falling to the ground in a piling crunch of crackling bones." blah blah blah., just watch the movie.

That is to say, unless The Details are meaningful to the character or the plot, I'll streamline it with some emotional prose to keep the story moving. Sex is in the same category as Violence and Swearing. When it's necessary to the story, I'll write it unabashedly, but when it's not, it's just distracting.  

DISTRACTING!

I never got the sex talk or the sex ed class (for reasons best left unstated), so I had to figure it out on my own with the help of some very helpful people. This was probably for the best, because it's significantly more complicated than those lectures would apparently have you believe. Anyways, I've achieved Journeyman status, so it's now my duty to wander the Earth to hone my skill until I can contribute something original to the craft.

My thesis statement: Anyone worth doing is worth doing well.

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Right, well, this little section is usually extraneous to the post, but I would very much like to express my enjoyment of the Pin-up genre of mild erotica. It doesn't get more classy that that, and for a bonus you sometimes escape with some Art. Artists have got to eat somehow, so we might as well all enjoy it.

Is it just me, or does she have way too many flowers in her hair?

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250 words? Yes
Project "Untitled"
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Reading - "Armor" (John Steakley)

*053

Silly Ideas, Delicious Snacks

Ridiculous thoughts are tasty candy, and I'm eating them one after the other and then throwing them back up on the page. Which is the best introduction that "Bitsy Pollo: A Love Story", the tale of a world where cows eat humans but one chicken of the vegetarian working class has Moral Qualms, deserves. Also I accidentally synopsized it.

Bitsy Pollo, everybody...um, she's a hero and she gets the girl in the end? The slave human girl who she teaches how to do simple maths and bathe herself? Damn, why aren't you all reading this Right Now, is what you're probably wondering.

Don't forget to enter the exciting Flash Fiction Orgy. Write a flash with the title "In Which There Is A Susurrus" and win the joy of victory...free!

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It turns out that a lot of other people have what I like to call "hobbies". They've got whole worlds going on after their dull office job that they hate is over. Nobody would ever guess.

Me? I'm turning my hobbies into my dull office job. Hopefully I won't drown, but at least everybody will know what's under the surface when I do.

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250 words? Yes
Flash "Bitsy Pollo, Save Us!"
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Reading - "Sharpe's Tiger" (Bernard Cornwell)

*052

Unleash Your Creati-Babble

I work best when I have an intelligent but non-Creative person to listen to me fill the dead air of daily life with my reckless idea talk. I work problems and plots and schemes and theories and other out by talking them out on somebody else.

The discourse flies out of my brain and sticks in the air, floating through the currents of my babble-face wanderings and making a general nuisance of itself as idea accretions gather around it in the stream of consciousness. Finally it's large enough to be grasped, and like a rounded pebble can be skipped across the surface once, twice and again until it hits the other side and becomes a Plan.

Then things are really moving forward, and there's no stopping that kind of momentum.

So, my advice to you, Writer, is to find somebody and babble at them until you close in on an Idea.

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Why do some rich people always seem so grumpy? Life experience and the entire course of human history has proven that money can indeed buy Happiness. Or you can sit around and complain about the declining quality of service amongst your country club manservants. Either way.

Get a job, no-hippy.

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250 words? Yes
Project "Untitled"
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Reading - ?

*051